A Child’s Schedule Equals a Mama’s Freedom
The sun rises and sets in a rhythmic pattern like an uncontrollable gift. It dictates the function of our lives and reveals patterns of seasons while marking the very concept of our timetables. Our lives revolve around the scheduled rising and falling of the sun. It’s like we were created for routine and a sense of order. EVEN for those of us who claim to live outside the walls of a schedule.
I am a very unscheduled person naturally. I have always flown by the seat of my own pants and love to let the wind blow me where it takes me. I don’t tend to like to make a plan, because I thrive on the feeling of freedom over my own time. For this reason, I had assumed I would be a mother who let life happen as it may every day. That was until I was give a book that changed my whole idea of how to archive freedom in motherhood. Baby Wise trains parents on how to set a schedule for your baby and guide them to a full night’s sleep naturally.
This book was the beginning of the many things I would learn as a mama of little ones and the glorious perks of a schedule. To say a schedule gives a mama freedom is just the beginning. It also creates…
A Happy Baby (no matter the personality type)
A Thriving Baby (physically, emotionally, and mentally)
An Easy Baby (for any mama)
This is the Golden Rule I share with anyone who asks me how I have such happy babies. It’s not luck, or per chance that we were gifted with happy babies. It was shaping their lives within a routine they could count on and thrive in. We are creatures of habit. That is how God created us. Therefore, forming healthy habits from the get-go for your children will only set them up for success!
WHY A SCHEDULE GIVES A MAMA FREDDOM
This seems like an oxymoron, but believe me, it is true! A scheduled baby means….
You know what to expect and when to expect it.
A happy baby, which means less time and energy for you.
A better sleep schedule for both you and baby.
When your baby is on a schedule you know when you can have “me time” or get things done. You know when they will sleep, how long they will sleep, and that they will go to sleep without any effort on your part. They have eating patterns, and therefore you are not dealing with a fussy, hungry baby all the time. A schedule also gives your baby structured sleep times that allow for better sleep and eventually lead to sleeping through the night naturally.
A SCHEDULE CREATES A HAPPY BABY NO MATTER WHAT THIER PERSONLITY IS
Our kids are each different in many ways and their personalities vary drastically. This is how I know that a schedule can create a happy baby no matter what their personality type is. Our first baby was calm and mellow pretty naturally, and everyone said we were so blessed. Then we had our girls and boy were they different! Both are FULL of energy and very determined. However, they did not follow the cranky, never satisfied attitude that most babies with their energy did. That is when people started asking how on earth we had such happy babies every time. I am confident it is because they were each scheduled babies.
This was proven when we would have a day or two that they got off their schedule and we started to see what everyone would consider a “normal” baby to be like. They would become cranky and irritable, and they would become clingy, not being able to self-play well. Every nap was a struggle, and it took so much energy to keep them satisfied.
It is not a new concept that children thrive on a schedule. This science is true from the moment they are born. God created us to be creatures of habit and, therefore, babies thrive on a schedule. Not only mentally, but also physically. Nursing on a schedule guarantees the best health for your baby. When nursing on-demand, the majority of the milk your baby is drinking is foremilk, which is not very rich in nutrients and pretty watery. When you nurse on a schedule, your baby is hungry enough to drink a full feeding every time, allowing your body to have a letdown, which then gives your baby that rich hindmilk, that is so crucial to their development, every time they nurse. I had each of my babies on a three-hour nursing schedule during the day until they started eating solids.
When you create a schedule that allows your baby to be awake right after they nurse instead of nursing before naps (like most people suggest), it makes for a very happy baby. You see, a baby is happies when their tummy is full. Therefore, letting them have floor time or self-play in a swing or bouncer right after feeding, will result in a more positive awake time. I would let my babies have an hour or so (it varied depending on how old they were) of awake time and then lay them down for a nap still AWAKE without nursing them beforehand. They would fall asleep without fussing and then sleep until they needed to eat again, making the '“crankiest” time of a baby’s schedule the time they are sleeping. With each of my babies I would have to wake them up usually to nurse. No bouncing or rocking my baby hoping they would make it to their feeding time. They would sleep right through it if I didn’t wake them up to nurse when it was time. Then they would nurse a full feeding and be as happy as a pig in mud again for their awake time.
A SCHEDULE HELPS A BABY THRIVE
“Children develop emotional security when their world is nurturing, consistent, and predictable. As children experience the same routines over and over, the brain strengthens connections that will lead to trust and secure attachments. Children who live in consistent environments also learn to regulate their own emotions and behavior better, because they know what to expect of the world around them. One of the best ways to provide repetition for the developing brain is to create consistency in the child's world. When a child has experiences in a positive and predictable environment, their brain becomes wired to relate to others, regulate behavior, and learn.” University of Georgia Extension
While learning never stops, the first few years of your baby’s life are the busiest when it comes to building their brain. More neural connections are forged in the first three years than at any other point in your baby’s life, according to Wonder Baby. Therefore, it is super beneficial for a child’s current state and their future state to have a healthy schedule that encourages consistent love and care by creating an environment the baby can rely on. A schedule is crucial to a happy baby now and a future emotionally stable child.
Wonder Baby also suggests leaving time in your schedule for your baby to observe, explore, and experiment. This might not look like much at first, but free play is essential for growing those important connections in your baby’s brain and building creativity and concentration. Floor time by themselves gives your baby opportunity to learn and grow, as well as prevent a clingy baby who needs you every waking moment of the day.
AN EASY BABY
The “myth” of an easy baby may not be a myth after all. When I first became a mom, I watched other moms exhausted from the daily care their baby demanded and wondered what I had gotten myself into. As my journey of motherhood plunged forward, I discovered that it didn’t have to be that way. The schedule gifted me an easy baby. Shaping the lifestyle of your baby to best fit your ideal life as a mom is not impossible. In fact, it is the easiest thing I have done as a mama, and it has had tremendous reward.
SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT
So many of us mamas dream of a full night’s sleep after our newborn is a month old. The newness has worn off and the exhaustion has set in. Getting up every three hours in the night takes its toll. Keeping to a schedule during the day and making sure that your baby gets a full feeding right before bed, will allow them to gradually extend the amount they sleep at a time. With my oldest two, they were only eating once a night by two months old and by six months were sleeping a full 10-12 hours every night.
Every baby will vary, as my first one was a big boy who loved food and drank a full feeding in the middle of the night until he was six months old, whereas my youngest was sleeping through the night naturally by the time she was a month old. You as a mother will be the best judge of when it’s time to sleep train them, but pretty much as soon as you must become a binkie in the night, they are ready to sleep train! To learn how I sleep trained all of my babies, check out my Sleep Training 101 blog post.
HOW TO GET MY BABY ON A SCHEDULE
The schedule will change as your baby does. It will be pretty simple at the beginning when they are tiny. They pretty much eat and sleep, eat and sleep, then eat and sleep some more. I just fed them every three hours from the moment they were born to get them in that schedule with little effort.
Once your baby is a few weeks old, they are ready for more awake time to discover the world around them. After every feeding I would let my baby be awake until they started getting very sleepy. At first, I sometimes had to interact with them a lot to keep them awake for 20-30 minutes, before they fell back asleep. Doing this helped them work into a routine of awake after feeding every time. It may take a few days or a week for them to work into this new aspect of their routine, but it will stick momentarily!
As they grow, their awake time does as well. Each baby is different, and you as the mom will be able to judge when your baby is ready for different changes in their schedule. If they are waking up before their feeding time, they are ready for more awake time prior to their nap.
The amount your baby is awake will grow to where their schedule has just as much awake time as sleep time. This looks like 1.5 hours awake followed by a 1.5 hour nap and then a feeding. This cycle will repeat all day. It may grow to 2 hours awake, 1 hour nap, and then feeding. I would give you age ranges this may happen in, but to be honest each of my three babies hit these stages at different times. Basically, as long as your baby is nursing every three hours, that may be the only similarity it may have with a baby it’s age on a schedule. Every baby is unique, and some sleep a lot while others are anxious to explore the world around them.
More sleep during the day equals better sleep at night! Say whaaaat?? Yep, the more your baby naps the better they will sleep at night. Good daytime nap routines equal a better night’s sleep. This made no sense to me when I first heard it, but I saw first hand that it is true! Do not deprive your babies of sleep during the day with the hopes of them having a better, longer nights sleep. It will only have the opposite effect. Let them nap when they need it and as long as they need it. A lot is happening in their body and their brain. They need rest and lots of it.
The one thing that stays constant is by 6 months your baby is ready for solid foods. I made my own homemade baby purees to save money, and they were much healthier for my babies. There are lots of ideas on how to work this into their schedule and honestly, I did it differently with every baby. A simple search on Pinterest will give you lots of ideas but here are few example schedules I created for my babies.
Once your baby starts eating more solids, they are ready for longer stretches between nursing. They will also be ready for solid food on top of their pureed food. I started my kids on sourdough that I tore up into small pieces for them to suck on when they didn’t have teeth. I then added diced up fruit and cooked veggies (so they are softer). Around 10-12 months old I would add chopped up meats. It is all up to your personal preference on what you feed your babies.
YOUR BABY CAN THRIVE
Every baby is able to thrive on a schedule! Even the crazy ones…. trust me! I have two girls full of energy and they are more stubborn than an old cow on a hot day. Even they were easy, happy babies on a schedule amidst their developing curiosity and sass.
The sun rises and sets in a rhythmic pattern like an uncontrollable gift. It’s like we were created for routine and a sense of order, and so were our babies. You’ve got this mama!